The Thirteenth Hour Podcast #317 and Like a Hood Ornament 37: Reading The Howard the Duck Movie Novelization Part 5, Rocketeer News, and Toymaking Updates
Some interesting news this week. The Rocketeer is supposedly getting a sequel! Now, I am not holding my breath, since there have been sequel rumors for years, and so far, they have all died on the vine. But it is exciting, nonetheless. Even if nothing comes of it, if it generates some interest in Dave Steven’s original comics and the 1991 film for a new generation, I view that as a win.
One thing that does seem more tangible, since it is slated for a release next month, is a beautiful Rockeeter board game. Now, I gotta be honest, board games have never really been my thing. Half the time, when I read the instructions, I go, “What? I don’t understand what the hell you are supposed to do. Who wrote these things?” Also, maybe once my kids are older and we can all play them together, it will be a different story, but most of the ones more complicated that Candy Landy require a level of concentration pretty much making them a no-go for the little ones. But … that is not to say that will always be the case! Plus, game or no game, I would buy this one for the little miniature Rocketeer figurines alone (which I was thinking of trying to make a few months ago – this saves me the trouble)! I will be looking forward to this one this fall for sure.
Speaking of The Rocketeer, I am using a Reaction Rocketeer figure as the base of the body for a 5 POA Kenner-style figure of Logan from The Thirteenth Hour. The head will be modified from a figure of the Charlie Sheen character from Red Dawn. Just need to do a few more touch ups and then make it all go together smoothly. More to come shortly.
Here are a few pictures of the Beverly minifigure I have been working on for the past few months: Just about done, I think. Just a few touch ups here and there.
And now, speaking of which, back to the duck!
This is the section in the story where Howard meets Phil (a young Tim Robbins). There are some really funny asides the author, Ellis Weiner, added for this segment:
Lastly, all proceeds to The Thirteenth Hour Studio on Etsy over Sept will be donated to the Red Cross (RedCross.org) for Hurricane Ida Relief. Check the link below to support those affected, still in the midst of the pandemic, with 80s retro art (music-books-toys).
This week, we’re again taking a short break from the 30th anniversary of The Rocketeer by celebrating the 35th anniversary of my another of my favorite films, Howard the Duck. The zaniness continues in the movie novelization of Howard the Duck by Ellis Weiner, based on the screenplay by Willard Huyck and Gloria Katz, though with a number of humorous and satirical additions that were unique to the novelization. Some of those are also found in the three part comic adaptation that came out about the same time as the film and novel. A few screenshots:
As mentioned in previous weeks, there is a Howard the Duck documentary, Howard the Doc, currently being created with interviews from some of the original writers / cast / crew. I do believe it is the only one that has ever been attempted for this first of all Marvel movies.
It is in the final stages of production. Their team needs some love / support / bucks to help complete the project, and you can support them on Indiegogo. Some crowdfunding platforms don’t result in any funding going to the creators if the final goal is not met, but in this case, the filmmakers will get it every penny that you contribute even if the final target is not met. If you have love for the 1986 film, comic, the original cast/crew, or 80s movies in general, please consider taking a look at the campaign, sharing on your social media, or contributing. Hopefully, then we can all see the final product!
Some screenshots of the production with Ed Gale (who was inside Howard), Jeffrey Jones (a.k.a. the principal who get booted in the face in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off), and Lea Thompson.
The minifigure that I am making of Beverly, along with a portrait of Howard, is now a perk if you contribute at the $125 level. Check out the fundraiser above; I believe it is ending on 8/30, so spread the word!
This week, we’re again taking a short break from the 30th anniversary of The Rocketeer by celebrating the 35th anniversary of my another of my favorite films, Howard the Duck. The zaniness continues in the movie novelization of Howard the Duck by Ellis Weiner, based on the screenplay by Willard Huyck and Gloria Katz, though with a number of humorous and satirical additions that were unique to the novelization. So far, I’m liking the novel version of Howard more than the movie version (some screenshots below from the film of this segment).
In this part of the chapter, we learn a little more about Beverly Switzler, the frontswoman of Cherry Bomb, an all female band essentially created for the film. Howard, sleeping in a garbage can, meets Beverly, who has just played a disappointing gig and gets accosted by some overly intrusive “fans.” He fakes some “quack fu” and scares the things away, though as in the film, Bev hardly sits passively at the sidelines.
I found some drawings I believe done by Joe Tompkins, the costume designer for the film. There’s a collection of sketches he did that you can see from the film for Beverly and Howard (click below for more info):
Speaking of the film, there is a Howard the Duck documentary, Howard the Doc, currently being created with interviews from some of the original writers / cast / crew. I do believe it is the only one that has ever been attempted for this first of all Marvel movies.
It is in the final stages of production. Their team needs some love / support / bucks to help complete the project, and you can support them on Indiegogo. Some crowdfunding platforms don’t result in any funding going to the creators if the final goal is not met, but in this case, the filmmakers will get it every penny that you contribute even if the final target is not met. If you have love for the 1986 film, comic, the original cast/crew, or 80s movies in general, please consider taking a look at the campaign, sharing on your social media, or contributing. Hopefully, then we can all see the final product!
Some screenshots of the production with Ed Gale (who was inside Howard), Jeffrey Jones (a.k.a. the principal who get booted in the face in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off), and Lea Thompson.
This week, we’re again taking a short break from the 30th anniversary of The Rocketeer by celebrating the 35th anniversary of my another of my favorite films, Howard the Duck. The zaniness continues in the movie novelization of Howard the Duck by Ellis Weiner, based on the screenplay by Willard Huyck and Gloria Katz, though with a number of humorous and satirical additions that were unique to the novelization. So far, I’m liking the novel version of Howard more than the movie version.
An example of some of the bits of humor thrown in by author Ellis Weiner that doesn’t make it onto the screen. Sometimes these movie novelizations were kind of phoned in, but so far, this one really goes above and beyond the call of duty.
Here is the section where we meet our heroine, Beverly. There is a little more detail about her and her band mates here than in the film, which is one of the nice things that these movie novelization did when done well.
Speaking of the film, there is a Howard the Duck documentary, Howard the Doc, currently being created with interviews from some of the original writers / cast / crew. I do believe it is the only one that has ever been attempted for this first of all Marvel movies.
It is in the final stages of production. Their team needs some love / support / bucks to help complete the project, and you can support them on Indiegogo. Some crowdfunding platforms don’t result in any funding going to the creators if the final goal is not met, but in this case, the filmmakers will get it every penny that you contribute even if the final target is not met. If you have love for the 1986 film, comic, the original cast/crew, or 80s movies in general, please consider taking a look at the campaign, sharing on your social media, or contributing. Hopefully, then we can all see the final product!
Some screenshots of the production with Ed Gale (who was inside Howard), Jeffrey Jones (a.k.a. the principal who get booted in the face in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off), and Lea Thompson.
This week, we’re taking a short break from the 30th anniversary of The Rocketeer by celebrating the 35th anniversary of my another of my favorite films, Howard the Duck. When I was creating the Aurora character from The Thirteenth Hour, Beverly from the film was one of the influences I used in creating Aurora’s character. Awhile back, I found an old copy of the movie novelization so figured this would be the perfect time to read it on the podcast. It’s based on the screenplay by Willard Huyck and Gloria Katz, so I’m thinking it may give some background info that might help explain some parts of the film. And this intro section does not disappoint – it is totally bonkers!
If you’re a member of the Patreon, check out the exclusive podcast they dropped this past weekend for more on the making of a Beverly minifigure. Will be posting periodic updates as the initial clay sculpt gets finished and the molding / casting process gets underway.
This week, I’m reading from the next installment of the fanfic short story, “The Last Rocketeer,” describing a team-up between Centauri from The Last Starfighter and a 71 year-old Cliff Secord who has long since given up being the Rocketeer (but secretly wants one last flight). He gets his chance in this tale! But as usual with Cliff, it all goes south! Find out what happens this week as the defecation starts to hit the proverbial ventilation!
There are now Thirteenth Hour toys! If you’d like to pick up one of these glow in the dark figures for yourself, feel free to email me or go to the Etsy store I set up (https://www.etsy.com/shop/ThirteenthHourStudio) and get them there.
If the past few months have got you needing a break, you may want to chill out to this 80s synth throwback track for a upcoming LP with the accompanying music video:
Empty Hands, the synth EP soundtrack to the novella, Empty Hands, is now out for streaming on Bandcamp.
Stay tuned. Follow along on Spotify! There is also a growing extended Thirteenth Hour playlist on Spotify with a growing number of retro 80s songs.
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s Instagram pages: @the13thhr for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art and and @the13thhr.ost for more 80s music, movies, and songs from The Thirteenth Hour books and soundtrack.
This film is probably John Hughes’ only real fantasy (sexually frustrated teenage boys create a woman a laFrankenstein or Pygmalion). So – basically, a pretty guy-centric film that has many things in it that would never get it made today. Still – despite all that, it has some great scenes that still hold up today. Check out these:
Look at how Lisa deals with Gary’s parents (who are your typical John Hughes parents, meaning that they are clueless).
A great scene with Vince Townsend Jr. (RIP)
“The Circle” by Max Carl is playing in the background with the boys wrap up the crazy party with their respective girls. The Weird Science soundtrack is another great soundtrack.
The scene “The Circle” is playing in always stuck with me. There was a little homage to it in this scene from The Thirteenth Hour. The main character, Logan, is trying to express similar sentiments to his best friend, Aurora, during a difficult point in their lives (they are both basically imprisoned):
The next day, a clanging sound woke me from my dream. I looked around, not quite aware what was real and what was still a dream.
“Chow time,” came the gruff voice of a guard, opening the door of my cell. Aurora stood behind him, carrying a basket. I noticed she was wearing a new dress. The guard put a meaty hand on the basket and pulled, but Aurora quietly but firmly held onto it. Then the guard let go, peeked inside, and grunted something that sounded like, “Huh. Alright. You can go in. But no funny business.”
“Hear that, Aurora? No funny business,” I said, yawning, wiping the sleepiness out of my eyes.
Aurora just shook her head and gave me one of her half smiles. “Always the joker.”
We sat against the wall, looking up at the sunlight coming through the small window by the ceiling as we ate the meal in the basket. When we had finished, we continued sitting there, and I guess a little smile crept over my face because after awhile Aurora asked, “What are you thinking?”
“I feel lucky.”
[POV change to Aurora temporarily] I laughed a little. “Lucky?” I asked, smiling at Logan.
“Well, you remember that first day we met?” Logan asked.
I nodded.
“What would’ve happened if it hadn’t been you who’d found me that day and taken me into the orphanage? What if it’d been someone else? We might not have gotten to know each other very well at all. Was it fate that we met? The Dreamweaver said he tries to just let things happen. So was it just chance?”
I shrugged, raising my eyebrows and smiling while cocking my head a little to the side to avoid the sun’s glare.
“You know, even if I could get to know all the women in the world, one by one, like in a giant, living catalog …” Logan started.
“Yeah,” I interrupted, “quote–unquote ‘get to know.’”
“Alright, whatever,” he continued, exasperated, “I suck at talking. But what I’m trying to say is that … if … if I were given the opportunity to create an ideal woman, like take some of this, mix it with some of that …”
“Oh, like a recipe.”
“Yes. I mean, no! Dammit, I knew what I wanted to say in my head, and it’s coming out all wrong.” He started again. “What I’m trying to say is … that if I could pick the perfect one … for me, she’d be … just like you. I think I always knew that. It’s just that … it took a long time for me to be able to tell you. So yes, in so many words, I feel lucky.”
I was actually a little stunned. Here’s a little something that took me a long time to figure out. If you complement someone soon after you meet him, you sound like a kiss–ass. But if you wait, get to know the person, and then complement him, your words carry so much more weight because then the person knows you’re sincere. In all the time I’d known Logan, this awkward, limping, borderline aphasic complement was probably the first, totally serious, non–joking one he’d ever given me. And it meant more to me than any flowing, articulate, greeting–card style prose could or ever would. My face grew hot, and I felt all warm inside. And now it was my turn to be tongue–tied.
“I … I feel lucky, too,” I said, finally, resting my head on his arm.
[Logan from here on out] Then the guard walked by and signalled that it was time for Aurora to go.
I thought of something. “New dress?”
“Oh, I found some old clothes lying around in my room. This one fits a little better.”
“Do you still have your grey dress? The one you got from the elves?”
“Sure, why?”
“Can I borrow it?”
She laughed loudly and asked, “Whatever would you want it for?”
“To use as a pillow. I don’t have one.”
I wasn’t sure, but I thought I saw Aurora blushing. “Sure, I mean … I … could just bring you a real pillow. I have an extra. But I’ll see,” Aurora started, looking down, “what I can put together, and I’ll get it to you next time I can slip away.” Then she looked back up at me and said, “To say that your cell needs furnishing is probably the understatement of the year. And we’ll have to see what we can do about your food service. Water with a side of algae just doesn’t cut it these days.”
The guard grunted something and led Aurora out. Through the bars, she looked back and whispered softly into my ear, “I love you, Logan.”
“I love you, too,” I said, reminding myself again of a debt I owed, a debt I wouldn’t mind paying for the rest of my life, to luck, to dreams and wishes, to Dragons’ Eyes and grey dresses, to love and other things.
I ended up writing a song to go with this particular scene for the soundtrack called “Love, Grey Dresses, and Other Things” that expresses similar sentiments:
Look for more John Hughes in the future!
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There are now Thirteenth Hour toys! If you’d like to pick up one of these glow in the dark figures for yourself, feel free to email me or go to the Etsy store I set up (https://www.etsy.com/shop/ThirteenthHourStudio) and get them there.
If you haven’t checked out “Arcade Days,” the song and video Jeff Finley, Brent Simon, and I finished one year ago, click on the link below to do so!
You can find more pictures and preview clips of “Arcade Days” on IG as well as this podcast’s FB page.
Empty Hands, the synth EP soundtrack to the novella, Empty Hands, is now out for streaming on Bandcamp.
Stay tuned. Follow along on Spotify! There is also a growing extended Thirteenth Hour playlist on Spotify with a growing number of retro 80s songs.
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s Instagram pages: @the13thhr for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art and and @the13thhr.ost for more 80s music, movies, and songs from The Thirteenth Hour books and soundtrack.
This week’s show is about the idea of the reluctant hero, an archetype in literature and film to describe an ordinary person thrust into extraordinary circumstances, and as a result does things beyond what he or she could ever had imagined. We also talk about various definitions of the word “hero,” from the ancient Greek usage, to hero in terms of an idol, to a hero in terms of someone who does something selfless to help someone else, whether in the everyday or out of the ordinary sense.
I didn’t read this segment in the show, but here a chapter in The Thirteenth Hour which describes this idea where Logan, the main protagonist, first becomes a reluctant hero:
The day before the end of basic training, I went into town to find a shoe repair shop. A buckle on my left shoe had broken a few days ago and now, every time I stepped down with that foot, my heel would slide out of the shoe. It was getting annoying, but I’d finally managed to put together enough money to cover what I thought it’d cost. One gold piece came from a poker game where I’d gotten lucky, and the rest I’d gotten from picking pennies off the street, which is what you do when you don’t get paid.
I asked a man on one of the crowded streets for directions. When I got to the shop, there was a big sign that said, “CLOSED FOR REPAIRS, WILL REOPEN IN TWO WEEKS.”
“Figures,” I thought to myself. “Two weeks? Maybe there’s another shop in town.” I went back to kicking a stone and trying not to fling my boot off in the process as I wandered through the downtown merchant sector, considering what to do next.
So there I was, minding my own business when I heard an ear–piercing scream. I spun around, forgetting all about my shoe and the rock. Right in the middle of the dirt road lay an old man, struggling to get up. About ten yards away, barrelling down the road at full speed was a four horse carriage. The driver in front was shouting out commands to his horses, but they weren’t listening. There was a big crowd of people watching from the sidewalks. I saw the woman that had screamed; she was still screaming.
“Somebody do something!” Apparently, that didn’t include herself.
In fact, everyone stared around blankly, waiting for someone else to make the first move. A few people new to the scene made faces and hurried off.
“Do something!” she screamed over and over.
Aw, shit, people, the lady had a point. Though I had half a mind to throw something at her to get her to shut up, I pushed past the people on the edge and jumped into the middle of the road. The next few seconds seemed to be in slow motion. Unfortunately, in what was to become regular pattern until progressing to a more advanced stage of cognitive development, I didn’t think first before doing something idiotic.
At any rate, the man was sitting up, dazed. I don’t know how close the carriage was, but it couldn’t have been far, because as I dove at the old man, tackling him around the waist, a horse clipped the loose heel of my boot, the busted one, sending it spinning off into the gutter. We rolled to the other side of the road, missing the remaining hooves by a heartbeat.
I sat up and looked around. The old man looked all right as far as I could tell, just a little shaken. Suddenly what seemed like hundreds of faces crowded around us.
“Are you all right?”
“Bravest thing I ever saw.”
“Somebody call a doctor!”
“That was a pretty rough fall that old fella took, is he okay?”
I stood and bent over the old man. He was breathing, but his eyes were closed. He looked like he was in pain, but he didn’t utter a sound when I asked if he felt alright.
“What happened? What happened? I didn’t see,” someone yelled.
“Well, this old fella was walking across the street, he tripped, and he couldn’t get up … mebbe ’cause he’s so old. Anyway, doesn’t matter now ’cause that’s when the kid jumped in. Tackled him around the waist.”
“The kid’s a hero!” said someone else. They looked at me, expecting me to say something.
“Well …” As usual, words failed me.
“Now, don’t be modest, you’re a hero, son.”
Okay, if these people wanted me to be a hero, then what the hell. Heroes are entitled to certain privileges, like new boots. Any takers?
Just then, a man in a white coat pushed his way through the crowd saying, “It’s okay, I’m a doctor!” He bent over the old man, briefly examining him.
After he had finished, the man said, “Probably just a twisted ankle. No serious injuries I can see from here, but let’s get him on that stretcher. Watch his head, and keep his neck still. We’ll carry him to my office. It’s just a few blocks from here,” said the doctor.
“I don’t need no damn stretcher!” yelled the old man.
“Everybody goes on the stretcher,” the doctor said emphatically.
“Ah, go to hell! At least let me talk to the kid that saved my rear end! Hey kid! Come over here!”
I walked over.
“I just wanted to thank you. My name’s Wally. What’s yours?”
“Logan.”
“Well, nice to meet you, Logan. I’m been living in this stinking kingdom for eighty–five years, and now I guess I’ll be able to stay for a few more years, huh?”
Now was that a good thing?
“You know, kid, you got a real set of marbles to do something like that. Hell, I wouldn’t have done that even for me! But hey, no complaints, glad you did. I could use a kid like you. What do you do for a living?”
“I’m … a soldier, I guess, in training.”
“No kidding! That’s perfect. Meet me at this address tomorrow; you won’t regret it!” he said, handing me a little white card.
“What’s it for?”
“Let me put it to you this way. You ever see a magician?”
I said I had once.
“And did you like it?”
I said I’d enjoyed the show.
“But weren’t you disappointed when you discovered that he was a fake? I mean, that he wasn’t using real magic, just tricks?”
I said I was disappointed when he told us that there was no such thing as magic.
“Nonsense! The lousy bastard didn’t know what he was talking about! See, you have to understand, real magicians like to keep that a secret … until it’s needed! So, of course there’s magic. I’m really not supposed to be telling you that, but, what the hell, kid, you just saved my life.”
“How do you know about magic?”
The old man looked both ways suspiciously. Motioning for me to come closer, he said, almost in a whisper, “I’ll get to that in a minute. This is what I’m proposing. How would you like to learn some genuine, old–fashioned magic? No bull now. Just the real thing. And get paid for it!”
“Well, sure, I guess.”
“Alright. You like traveling? Seeing new places?”
“Well, I haven’t really done any, but I would like to.”
“Great! How about sports? You like running, climbing, jumping, fencing, things like that?”
“Um, yeah, they’re okay.”
“Would you like to be better at those games? You’ll get better in this job!”
“Sure … I guess. What is this job, anyway?”
“Yeah, so it’s all set then. Meet me tomorrow. I’ll see to it that an announcement is made tomorrow morning.”
Just then the doctor motioned to his assistant, who picked up the other end of the stretcher.
“Umm, that’s nice and all, but I live in the castle training grounds. It’s awfully hard for anyone from the outside to get inside there.”
“Oh, silly me! Did I mention that I am one of King Darian’s wizards? Well, that’s me. Wally the Wizard at your service. I’ll see you tomorrow!” he shouted as he was being carried away.
Wait a minute, I thought to myself. Something sounded fishy here. What was one of the King’s wizards doing outside the castle walls? They supposedly always stayed locked up in one of the remote wings of the castle. This one was an awfully smooth talker. I wondered if this had something to do with what those two knights were talking about; one of them had mentioned the King’s wizards. Something didn’t sound right. He never even told me what the job was. And …
“Wait!” I yelled. “What’s the catch?”
But the wizard was too far away to hear.
“Ah, shit,” I muttered to myself, finding my left boot wet and slime–covered in the gutter. I wiped it off on some grass and secured the loose buckle as best I could. It squished every time I stepped on it. Something wasn’t right, but like the proverbial stinking turd, I’d stepped right in it.
Well, I thought, kicking another stone the rest of the way back to the castle, on the bright side, at least I am walking away. Of all the ways to end up dead or in the hospital, getting trampled was not one I’ve ever wanted to experience.
This little animated .gif is, of course, from the point in the movie where the Rocketeer, not above a little self conscious vanity, asks how he looks. Peevy, not above a little blunt honesty, says “Like a hood ornament!” The Rocketeer blasts off for the first time, Peevy gets blown backwards into the hangar, and I get a name for this part of the podcast!
I first learned of the term “reluctant hero” from an ad for The Rocketeer. Cliff is not motivated initially by much other than a desire to make some money and get in the good graces of his girlfriend, a rising starlet with an eye for the finer things in life (at least from Cliff’s perspective). There are lots of other great examples from cinema and literature.
One of my favorites is from the 1992 movie, Hero, with Dustin Hoffman, Geena Davis, Andy Garcia, and Joan Cusak. The Dustin Hoffman character is a minor conman, if I recall right (I need to watch the movie again) who becomes a reluctant hero after he saves a bunch of people from a plane crash but can’t take credit for the act. I love this ending scene – both for its life lessons as well as its insight into human nature. As hinted above in The Thirteenth Hour passage, a lot of people don’t want to do heroic things, especially when eyes are on them. They might act when someone else initially steps in, but making that first step (like Logan does above or Bernie does in the scene below), takes a certain, well, heroic disregard for what other people think, and as social animals, that’s not always the easiest thing for humans to have.
Although I hadn’t seen Hero yet when I originally wrote The Thirteenth Hour, I had seen The Last Starfighter – many times, in fact – and the way Alex Rogan behaves through most of the movie is very much in keeping with the way of the reluctant hero (as well as one of the influences in the creation of Logan). Here’s when he’s first offered the chance to be a Starfighter:
Stay tuned for more Rocketeer gear talk next week! Stay safe!
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There are now Thirteenth Hour toys! If you’d like to pick up one of these glow in the dark figures for yourself, feel free to email me or go to the Etsy store I set up (https://www.etsy.com/shop/ThirteenthHourStudio) and get them there.
If you haven’t checked out “Arcade Days,” the song and video Jeff Finley, Brent Simon, and I finished one year ago, click on the link below to do so!
You can find more pictures and preview clips of “Arcade Days” on IG as well as this podcast’s FB page.
Empty Hands, the synth EP soundtrack to the novella, Empty Hands, is now out for streaming on Bandcamp.
Stay tuned. Follow along on Spotify! There is also a growing extended Thirteenth Hour playlist on Spotify with a growing number of retro 80s songs.
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s Instagram pages: @the13thhr for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art and and @the13thhr.ost for more 80s music, movies, and songs from The Thirteenth Hour books and soundtrack.
In the first part of the show, I’m reading from a section of The Thirteenth Hour about what Aurora thought about her first experience flying on Lightning, Logan’s magical hoverboard.
We left for the Castle in the Water the next day. Logan showed me his air board called Lightning; it was somehow able to expand itself so I could fit on as well. Let’s just say it’s better if you suspend belief a little. I guess that’d be a fitting theme for the following section, indeed this whole story, but I’m getting ahead of myself.
Getting on Lightning was one thing, but flying was something else entirely. There was only one foot strap for me, so I had to hold onto Logan. I think I would have anyway. I had never been more than twenty feet off the ground in my life. Logan said he was still getting the hang of it when Lightning beeped out something. Words appeared on some kind of window near her front. They said that I wouldn’t fall off because there was a protective shield around the board. I wasn’t so sure, and even to this day, a ride on Lightning makes me want to vomit.
I suppose flying was fun, in a white–knuckle–ride–by–the–seat–of–your–wet–pants sort of way, but I never really got the hang of it, even though Logan tried to show me how to pilot Lightning. It should have been easy – you rocked your body back and forth to go up or down and swayed your hips to turn – but I guess it just wasn’t my thing, and I nearly had a heart attack when I accidentally flipped us upside down.
The altitude was one thing, but the speed completely blew me away. Okay, I know, not funny. But really, if you can imagine being shrunk, tied to the head of an arrow, then fired in the air from one of those six foot war bows like the ones the King’s archers used, then you’ll have some idea what it felt like.
Flying that fast always made me nauseous. That first time, after an hour or two, I couldn’t take it anymore and told Logan to get Lightning to pull over to the coast (we were flying over water), where I threw up in some bushes. I collapsed onto my back, staring up at the sky, which, for some reason, kept spinning round and round. That’s how Logan found me. It all seemed very unladylike, and I guess I was looking very sheepish when I climbed back on Lightning, because Logan, who must have figured out what I was doing, asked if I were okay.
I grunted something. I guess I looked okay, so he grinned.
“I puked all over my uniform a few days ago, if that’s any consolation to you.”
It wasn’t, really, because we ended up having to stop two or three more times later on, but it made me laugh a little at the time.
[Logan] Yeah, I always did wonder where it all came from. It’s not like we had an overabundant food supply, that’s for sure. But she seemed to have a never ending supply of that stuff.
You know, who’s telling this section, you or me?
[Logan] Couldn’t help it.
Right. So, blah, blah, blah, whatever, I threw up a lot. Very funny. Anyway, after that, Lightning slowed down to a kind of cruising speed, which was really nice because it gave us a chance to actually see the landscape we were passing.
At the end of our first day out, we stopped on a deserted section of coastline to eat and sleep. We had used our pockets and a sack we found to stash food liberated from the Cordel marketplace, but neither of us were very hungry. You already know why I wasn’t, but I think it was pretty tough on Logan’s stomach, too. It had been a long day of travel for both of us, and our heads were still spinning as we lay them on the damp sand. I leaned over and told Logan that I was glad I could accompany him on his journey and apologized for slowing us down today. But I think he was falling asleep already, because he just smiled a little, as if to say, “forget it,” and patted me on the shoulder.
Another picture painted as the cover art for “Searching for Forever” (that would have fit in towards the end of the book with Logan and Aurora flying to the new home). Watch it being created below:
There’s an instrumental part to accompany the reading – the backing track of “Searching for Forever” – the 80s inspired ending credits song I envisioned as playing as the story ended. Both the instrumental and vocal versions can be found on the LP, Long Ago Not So Far Away, and below:
Speaking of music, I’ve been going through a number of acoustic guitar songs I used to play a lot when I was first learning how to play, since in this time of national quarantine, I try to do music time with my kids as a part of, you know, daddy daycare. I’ve picked out a few that are more hopeful and positive than the stuff songs are often written about (heartbreak, unrequited love, longing, substance use, and other important adult matters). Anyway, I’ve included one such song (“Flying Free” written by Don Besig) since it is about flying (whether figuratively or literally) free from the constraints that bind us to the earth (again, whether physical or mental).
That’s because today’s Rocketeer segment is also about flying!
Today marks the fourth Rocketeer segment as a part of the podcast. Below are a few previous episodes about the Rocketeer:
This week, we’re discussing this little documentary hosted by Bill Campbell that came out about the same time as the movie (and sadly, not available on any of the official Rocketeer releases). It is part history of flight documentary, part behind the scenes movie making, and part experiential journalism into different modes of flight (including actual rocketpacks).
Suffice to say, real life rocketpacks highlight the myriad limitations such a device would likely entail. But … that’s why we have stories 🙂
We also talked, among other things, about those vague Rocketeer sequel rumors. But, you know what? Even if it never happens, we got a cartoon to introduce a whole new generation to the Rocketeer and an epic rocketpack battle in The Mandalorian:
This little animated .gif is, of course, from the point in the movie where the Rocketeer, not above a little self conscious vanity, asks how he looks. Peevy, not above a little blunt honesty, says “Like a hood ornament!” The Rocketeer blasts off for the first time, Peevy gets blown backwards into the hangar, and I get a name for this part of the podcast!
Stay tuned for more Rocketeer gear talk next week! Stay safe!
∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞
There are now Thirteenth Hour toys! If you’d like to pick up one of these glow in the dark figures for yourself, feel free to email me or go to the Etsy store I set up (https://www.etsy.com/shop/ThirteenthHourStudio) and get them there.
If you haven’t checked out “Arcade Days,” the song and video Jeff Finley, Brent Simon, and I finished one year ago, click on the link below to do so!
You can find more pictures and preview clips of “Arcade Days” on IG as well as this podcast’s FB page.
Empty Hands, the synth EP soundtrack to the novella, Empty Hands, is now out for streaming on Bandcamp.
Stay tuned. Follow along on Spotify! There is also a growing extended Thirteenth Hour playlist on Spotify with a growing number of retro 80s songs.
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s Instagram pages: @the13thhr for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art and and @the13thhr.ost for more 80s music, movies, and songs from The Thirteenth Hour books and soundtrack.
This week’s show is about clothing – Logan’s Imperial Ranger uniform in Empty Hands and The Thirteenth Hour as well as Cliff’s jacket in the Rocketeer segment (which inspired the way I drew Logan’s costume).
In the first part of the show, I’m reading from a section of The Thirteenth Hour interlude, Empty Hands, which describes what the Imperial Rangers wore for formal uniforms:
The morning of the Drawing was cool and crisp. The last vestiges of winter were still apparent, though you could get by without a coat if you were willing to be a little chilly. For the ceremony, we were supposed to wear our formal uniforms, which we started training in a few days prior. Unlike many things about the Imperial Army, a lot of thought had gone into Imperial Ranger gear, and although there were no surviving craftsmen who knew how to make Imperial Ranger boots, uniforms, and weapons, enough of the old training manuals had survived that the ones in the castle could learn. Compared to the stiff, uncomfortable uniforms the regular Army soldiers wore, the Ranger uniforms were fairly well designed. They were intended to be working uniforms and could look sharp if clean and pressed, but they had both functional and cosmetic purposes due to the Rangers’ multiple roles as soldier, explorer, bodyguard, and diplomat.
As our instructors had said, we did have to move a bit differently when fighting in our uniforms, though not as much as one might have thought. The pants and shirts were baggy and easy to move in, for instance, and the outer tunic that covered the shirt was flexible but offered protection since it was interwoven with a layer of fine-link chain-mail backed by suede to keep the links from embedding in a wound should the chain-mail break. It wasn’t as heavy as wearing a full chain-mail shirt, but it offered disguised protection from glancing strikes to the internal organs of the torso. It wouldn’t stop a point blank shot from a warbow, but then again, there’s a good chance standard plate armor wouldn’t, either.
All this flashed through my head as I raced to get ready that morning. Unlike most days, there had been no early morning conditioning session, so everyone had slept later. My bed was in the corner, and I must have continued sleeping as Blake, who had the top bunk, left with the others for breakfast. When I woke, the position of the sunlight shining in the window let me know immediately that I had overslept, and a glance at the clock in the corner confirmed it was 8:50, meaning I had exactly ten minutes to get to the field where the Drawing would be taking place. Cursing, I ran to the washroom, took care of my morning business, and rummaged through my locker, searching for a uniform that wasn’t crumpled or malodorous. I’d hung up my sweaty uniform in the washroom after yesterday’s practice, but someone must have knocked it over soon after, since now it lay in a crumpled, smelly heap on the floor. We had three each, but my other one smelled even worse, so it took some digging to get to my last one, which was still wrapped in the bag in which it had been issued to me. I raced out the door as soon as I had it on and ran the whole way to the field where the King would be addressing us for the formal commencement of the Drawing.
I was still late.
A concept sketch of the Imperial Rangers wearing the uniforms described above.
Another sketch of Logan flying through the air on Lightning wearing the uniform described above.
There’s a little instrumental part to accompany parts of the story where the Imperial Rangers have to march around (in the LP Long Ago Not So Far Away) that is playing in the background during part of the reading.
Speaking of music, I’ve been going through a number of acoustic guitar songs I used to play a lot when I was first learning how to play, since in this time of national quarantine, I try to do music time with my kids as a part of, you know, daddy daycare. I’ve picked out a few that are more hopeful and positive than the stuff songs are often written about (heartbreak, unrequited love, longing, substance use, and other important adult matters). Anyway, I’ve included one such song (“If We Hold On Together” from the 1988 cartoon, The Land Before Time), as it was co-written by James Horner, who also did the music for, yes, you guessed it, The Rocketeer.
Today’s Rocketeer segment is also about flying – the Rocketeer’s jacket!
Today marks the fourth Rocketeer segment as a part of the podcast. Below are a few previous episodes about the Rocketeer:
This week, we’re discussing Cliff’s jacket – the iconic leather jacket with the front bib making up the front. Although you can totally buy lots of replica jackets, the origin of the jacket is totally unknown to me. I have never exactly been able to find where Dave Stevens got the idea for it but have a few guesses about things he may have been influenced by or watched as a kid:
-Commander Cody serials (which you can totally watch on Youtube) – wears a leather jacket; note the similarities to the Rocketeer’s helmet and double barreled silver rocketpack.
-Westerns, like this shot of John Wayne in Horse Soldiers:
You can see a photo above of Dave Stevens on the right trying on a Rocketeer helmet wearing Cliff’s jacket (he used photos of himself as models for Cliff).
This little animated .gif is, of course, from the point in the movie where the Rocketeer, not above a little self conscious vanity, asks how he looks. Peevy, not above a little blunt honesty, says “Like a hood ornament!” The Rocketeer blasts off for the first time, Peevy gets blown backwards into the hangar, and I get a name for this part of the podcast!
Stay tuned for more Rocketeer gear talk next week! Stay safe!
∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞
There are now Thirteenth Hour toys! If you’d like to pick up one of these glow in the dark figures for yourself, feel free to email me or go to the Etsy store I set up (https://www.etsy.com/shop/ThirteenthHourStudio) and get them there.
If you haven’t checked out “Arcade Days,” the song and video Jeff Finley, Brent Simon, and I finished one year ago, click on the link below to do so!
You can find more pictures and preview clips of “Arcade Days” on IG as well as this podcast’s FB page.
Empty Hands, the synth EP soundtrack to the novella, Empty Hands, is now out for streaming on Bandcamp.
Stay tuned. Follow along on Spotify! There is also a growing extended Thirteenth Hour playlist on Spotify with a growing number of retro 80s songs.
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s Instagram pages: @the13thhr for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art and and @the13thhr.ost for more 80s music, movies, and songs from The Thirteenth Hour books and soundtrack.
This week’s show is all about flying, both in the traditional part of the podcast as well as in the Rocketeer segment. I’ll always aim for them to be related if possible, since, after all, The Rocketeer was one of the things that influenced the writing and creation of the Thirteenth Hour world.
In the first part of the show, I’m reading from the chapter where the main protagonist, Logan, is gifted a silver hoverboard he calls Lightning that has its own onboard magical “computer” (though that’s never exactly stated), allowing for a kind of magic artificial intelligence, and runs off the power of the sun (again, never exactly stated, at least not in this one).
Just to get us in the mood, I thought I’d include the intro from the 1984 film, The Neverending Story, for the quintessential audiovisual cloudscape experience:
Here is the passage from The Thirteenth Hour:
Lightning beeped cheerfully and drifted slowly forward down the lighted blue pathway that I had walked down earlier. She really picked up speed in the windy section near the entrance. I crouched down low, white–knuckling the board with both hands. Maybe I should have practiced a little first, I began thinking to myself. But Aurora was in trouble, and I needed to concentrate on that. The flight to Cordel would have to be my practice. Lightning shot out of the Palace and began to climb steeply. My heart plummeted into my stomach, and I prayed that we would slow down, eyes shut, knuckles even whiter as I gripped the edges of the board for dear life.
The board beeped then; I opened my eyes slightly, and by shielding them against the torrential winds, I was able to see a message flash across the complicated, yet impressive looking front of the board.
“Relax, Logan! There’s no way you can fall. Both your feet are now strapped in. You can let go of my sides if you want. Have fun!”
I looked down; my right foot was now securely strapped onto the board. I stayed crouched low, but let go of the edges, first one hand, then another. As soon as I did, I felt as if I were going to fall backwards and began to flail my arms. Lightning slowed down a little, allowing me to regain my balance. But at every dip, my stomach felt like it was shooting up to my throat. I wanted to grab onto something solid, but I realized that there was nothing but air to hold onto! In desperation, I gripped the side of the board again, but it didn’t do any good.
“This is harder than I thought!”
Another message flashed across the screen.
“Well, it really isn’t too hard once you get the hang of it. Just relax and let me do the work. Now, how about some aerobatics, my favorite?”
“Uh, wait a minute! Aerobatics? Is that anything like acrobatics? I don’t think I’m ready for that!” I yelled.
“Sure you are! You just don’t know it yet! All you have to do is hang on!” flashed the screen.
I yelled a succession of curses as my stomach shot up to my throat as Lightning spun around three times in succession. The screen read, “Barrel roll maneuvers complete.”
Whatever that meant! She ended up in an inverted position, with me looking at the sea, dizzy. I had paid so much attention to the insides of my eyelids that I hadn’t looked around to notice how high we were. We seemed to be traveling at an insane speed. The waves far below flashed by in a blur. The wind kept getting caught in my gaping mouth and bellowing out my cheeks while I struggled to close my mouth. At one point, I felt like I was going to fall out, dangling only by the straps holding my feet onto the board. Instinctively, I grabbed both sides of the board. Lightning rolled back over, and I breathed easier.
“This might help you out. I am going to deploy an invisible shield that will surround you and myself. It’s just like a big bubble. It will cut air resistance and protect you. And just in case you’re interested, it will prevent you from falling should you manage to slip out of the foot restraints.”
“We couldn’t have done this before?” I croaked, as wind caught in my mouth, hard that time, stunning my vocal chords.
“No, my programming instructs us to be at least fifty miles away from the Palace before I deploy the bubble shield.”
“Why fifty?”
“If I overheat, I could self–destruct. The explosion would level anything in the surrounding area within a fifty mile radius.”
“Self–destruct?” I repeated, horrified.
“The shield has never been tested before. There’s a very slight chance that it will overload my systems.”
“Overload?”
“Is it just me or is there an echo here? It’s alright. The shield’s up now. All systems are operating well within normal limits. However, it’s written in my programming to warn all passengers if they aren’t.”
As if they could do anything about it, except maybe jump off and die hitting the ground instead of in a mid–air explosion. The wind didn’t seem to be blowing as hard now, though I couldn’t see the shield, nor could I feel it. But I noticed that it was much quieter, and I could talk without shouting, although there was still a ringing in my ears from the rushing wind.
“It seems to work,” I said, feeling around tentatively.
I looked back; I couldn’t see the Palace. When I asked how far we were away from it, Lightning flashed across her screen, “About 75 miles right now.”
Jeez, we were going fast. We couldn’t have been in the air very long; under an hour, I guessed. I looked back again and noticed a plume of colored, sparkling mist in our wake. It looked just like a rainbow. I looked under the board; the mist was coming out of three separate locations on Lightning’s bottom side.
“Those are my engines.”
I realized that I had been so caught up in the excitement/horror of my ride with Lightning that I had never even questioned how she generated her power.
As if reading my mind, Lightning flashed, ”I can show you the owner’s manual later that discusses more of the specifics, but for now, all you need to know is that there’s a readout on my display that shows how much power I have left.”
I found the icon on her display, which read 95% power.
“You know, I don’t mean to sound ungrateful or anything, because I really appreciate you going fast since you know I’m in a hurry and all, but do you think you could slow down just a little? I think I left my stomach somewhere behind the last mountain.”
“No, according to my scanner, you still have it.”
“Oh … it was just a manner of speaking, you know …”
“A joke?”
I laughed. “Well, almost, I guess.”
“Tell me a joke then.”
“Oh, I don’t know any good ones. When we find Aurora, we’ll ask her. She’ll know some.”
“All right. Nothing like learning how to swim by jumping in the deep end, huh, Logan?”
“Right. Without a lesson.”
“Well, no one ever did learn to swim in a turtle pool.”
“What’s a turtle pool?”
“You never had one of those? One of those little plastic kiddie pools about a foot deep that you fill up with a hose?”
“Plastic? Kiddie pool? Hose?”
“Ehh, never mind. Probably just some stuff that hasn’t been invented yet. One of these days I really have to organize my files.”
“So … how long until we reach Cordel?” I asked.
“About thirty minutes. How do you like flying around like this so far?”
“I like it, especially with the bubble shield.”
“Good! We’ll always fly with it on from now on. I’m glad you like flying! I knew you were a flyer when I first saw you!” flashed the board, with a few friendly beeps.
“We’re going to take a little detour, and I think I’ll throw in a few tricks, just to keep things interesting. Wouldn’t want you to fall asleep or anything!”
“Oh, I really don’t think you’ll have to worry about …”
Just at that second, I tried to scream as Lightning shot upward suddenly, but my voice was still somewhat hoarse. All that came out was some kind of croaking sound. Then she hung a hard right, shot into a loop with a couple of twists thrown in, and straightened out high above the clouds. My stomach, however, took a little longer.
“Guh … give me a minute to recover,” I panted.
“Okay. It’s pretty much a straight trip from here, so we’ll take it easy so you can get used to doing turns and things like that. Of course, you can always count on me to fly, but I thought you’d like to give it a shot yourself.”
By shifting my weight left and right, I was able to make turns. By leaning forwards or backwards, I could either climb or dive. I even tried a tentative loop with all the grace of a one–legged stork.
“Hey, not bad!” flashed the message board. “See, it’s not so hard!”
“I guess …” I said.
“Logan, I know what you need! A little attitude! How about some music? ‘Cause there isn’t much to see up here. Just clouds, and when you’ve seen one, you’ve pretty much seen them all. And there’s nothing like music to boost your confidence!”
“Music?” I asked, a little surprised.
“Yes. One of my unsung talents.”
“Hey, Lightning, that was a joke! Well, kind of, anyway. I think that’s called a pun.”
“Really? Well, see, things are looking up already!”
I heard a sound suddenly. Or sounds, rather, but they were like nothing I had ever heard before. The music sounded slow, at first, then it picked up pace, until the speed of the music matched the speed of our flying. It was strangely futuristic, but at the same time, it seemed like I had always known the melody. [When I was originally writing this passage, I had the melody from When in Rome’s “The Promise” in mind.]
There were words sung, too, but in a language that I neither understood nor wanted to understand; somehow, the mystery of the words added to the mystique of the music. In a way, this is in vain, as my description here will do no justice to the melody, because there are some things that are perhaps impossible to describe in words and are better left unspoken.
I felt, at that moment, an incredible rush of energy and indescribable exhilaration. I felt ready to take on the world – or, at least, a dragon or two. All my fears of flying vanished like the mist of the rainbow behind us. The feeling of gliding through the air with the wind rushing through my hair, sleeves and pant legs flapping back and forth, and the music rushing up to meet my ears was indescribable. But it is perhaps best compared to that day, long ago, when, as I stood at the top of the hill near the castle, looking out at the landscape around – I let the wind take my hand and lead me to dance.
I later wrote a song for Long Ago Not So Far Away about this part of the book that became the song, “I’ll Fly Away.” It has two versions, both below – with varying levels of synth and tempo depending on your mood!
Today’s Rocketeer segment is also about flying – the Rocketeer’s rocketpack!
Today marks the third Rocketeer segment as a part of the podcast. Below are a few previous episodes about the Rocketeer:
This week, we’re discussing three versions of the rocketpack (in descending order below): 1.) the sliver-purple one with fins from the comics, 2.) the finless silver double barrelled Art Deco one from the movie, and 3.) the silver and purple double barrelled one with fins from the cartoon that came out this past fall.
Here are a few design ideas on the gloves and rocketpack from the film, showing the original prototype (closer to Dave Steven’s original drawings), then how it evolved into the double silver bullet shape seen in the film (these come from The Rocketeer Official Movie Souvenir Magazine).
Here are some excerpts from the original comic drawn by Dave Stevens about how the rocket pack was controlled and refueled. (The images below come from The Rocketeer: The Complete Deluxe Edition, which is unfortunately quite difficult to find now – look on Amazon and eBay for used copies at more reasonable prices).
This little animated .gif is, of course, from the point in the movie where the Rocketeer, not above a little self conscious vanity, asks how he looks. Peevy, not above a little blunt honesty, says “Like a hood ornament!” The Rocketeer blasts off for the first time, Peevy gets blown backwards into the hangar, and I get a name for this part of the podcast!
Stay tuned for more Rocketeer gear talk next week! Stay safe!
∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞
There are now Thirteenth Hour toys! If you’d like to pick up one of these glow in the dark figures for yourself, feel free to email me or go to the Etsy store I set up (https://www.etsy.com/shop/ThirteenthHourStudio) and get them there.
If you haven’t checked out “Arcade Days,” the song and video Jeff Finley, Brent Simon, and I finished one year ago, click on the link below to do so!
You can find more pictures and preview clips of “Arcade Days” on IG as well as this podcast’s FB page.
Empty Hands, the synth EP soundtrack to the novella, Empty Hands, is now out for streaming on Bandcamp.
Stay tuned. Follow along on Spotify! There is also a growing extended Thirteenth Hour playlist on Spotify with a growing number of retro 80s songs.
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s Instagram pages: @the13thhr for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art and and @the13thhr.ost for more 80s music, movies, and songs from The Thirteenth Hour books and soundtrack.
On this week’s show, I thought we’d do a little more quarantine / seclusion real talk – specifically on self reflection when alone with your thoughts, as many people are these days, kind of like Logan in one part of The Thirteenth Hour, which we’ll be reading from shortly. We may ignore or put off deep thinking in day to day life, either out of discomfort, fear of what we’ll find, or lack of time. But, on the other hand, sometimes being alone with your thoughts offers the most freedom of expression, since there is no one else to censor your thought process except you (and the voice of society, upbringing, etc – though that’s still you, just your interpretation of those things).
Here are are some of passages from The Thirteenth Hour referenced in the episode:
I don’t know how long I sat there – I was vaguely aware of the sun going down at some point, but my mind wasn’t really on that. I struggled a lot that day, but not with nausea or sleep. I had always been a pretty optimistic person – most dreamers are, I think – and liked to think that people were basically good inside. I wanted to believe that there were happy endings, and that it wasn’t just something people wrote about in books so they could vicariously experience something they never knew in real life. I basically wanted the world to be a good place, or if not good, at least non–imposing, leaving me free to do what I wanted. I had always thought if you left people alone, they’d leave you alone. But that didn’t always happen, did it? It was like being a grain of sand in a desert where a simple gust of wind or footprint could shift the position of the grains all around you, changing your own position. Perhaps accepting that was part of something called growing up, but I sure didn’t have to like it.
If it’s just one person, perhaps life is simpler, but when there is another, things get more complicated. I wanted to believe that love could work out, too, even though I still didn’t really know what it felt like. But I was an optimist and wanted to believe that I would know what love was like one day. But if love meant surrendering part of yourself, could you really do that if you felt ashamed of what you had to give? …
… And though I never asked her to, she came each day after that, even if it was just to sit by me and put cold compresses on my body as I drifted in and out of feverish sleep. Sometimes I wondered why she did, since I had so little to offer in terms of companionship. But finally, one day, the fever broke, and I awoke to find that the pounding in my head had gone. I looked out my window – night. I did not feel like sleeping anymore and began to test my unsteady legs. As I hobbled in and out of the shadows of my darkened cell, I found my mind wondering when Aurora would stop by. Of course, not until daylight, many hours from now, a realization that stung a little at first. But the more I thought about it, the sting became an ache that racked my body painfully until I was forced to sit down on the floor. There, with labored breaths, I thought back on specific things that had happened over the past few weeks, over the past few years, over the course of my life. Then there was a spark, a sudden flash of light, and it all became so clear; I marveled how I could have been so blind.
It was then that I understood why the bards so often sung of love, because for the first time, I actually knew what they were singing about. Because it was then I knew that it was love that I’d been falling into all along; I just hadn’t known enough about it to realize what it was. And then, to my surprise, I rolled over onto the floor and began to cry. Maybe I was happy, maybe I was sad, I didn’t know. But I hadn’t really cried in such a long time that it was like I was experiencing it for the first time. The tears that flowed from my eyes pushed away the dirt and sweat and grime, leaving a clean streak behind, fresh and ready for the future.
(POV change to Aurora) I found him sleeping there on the floor the next morning. He did not stir when I walked in. I knelt down and felt his forehead; the fever had passed. For the first time in many days, he looked like he was at peace. I did not disturb him. But after a few minutes, he opened his eyes and saw me next to him. Then, he sat up slowly, looked at me, and smiled. There was something different in his smile, but I smiled back all the same. And then I knew what it was; he understood! Then we put our arms around each other and stayed that way in that dank, dirty cell for a long, long time.
I wrote a song for Long Ago Not So Far Away about this part of the book that I talked about a little back in episode 51 (recorded around the time I wrote it). The lyrics and associated chords are below:
C There’s this girl that I know G Am Actually, I’ve known her all my life, F It seems, to me.
C G And when she found me, as a child Am F All alone, without a soul, to call my own. C Best friends were we G Am F Did I ever say how much that meant … to me?
C And so … the seasons go G Am Promises of childhood seem so bold. F Can they grow old?
C G Now I hold her hand but Am As an adult man, and something is … F G Different this time.
C That grey dress she wears G Am Seen it a hundred times before F But not like tonight, not like tonight. ‘Cause C There’s a fire in her eyes G Am The wind catches a lock of her hair F And my heart lifts in time. C There’s a smile on her face G Am One I know that time can not erase … F But it feels new.
C G And then all at once, it hits me like a thousand tons Am F How I could’ve been so blind? C G And that’s when I knew why songs are sung of love Am Because, because, because … it was love F C I was falling in … this whole time.
Instrumental: C G Am F C
The album version of the song (instrumental version above):
When I was producing the song, I added more layers and an electric guitar segment to the latter parts of the song to beef up the song what is essentially a four chord folk ballad to create a dichotomy between the slow, tender, piano part with a louder, more biting, aggressive part reminiscent of an 80s metal ballad. I wanted it to be that way to capture the balance between Logan’s tender realization in a time of vulnerability contrasted with the flash of insight that he must lift himself up out of a hole in the ground (quite literally – he is a dungeon, after all) with his strength of will.
Today also marks the second Rocketeer segment as a part of the podcast. Below are a few episode mentions about the Rocketeer prior to last week’s show on Cliff Secord’s biography:
This week, I’m reading from some of Dave Stevens’ handwritten notes on the backstory he created for Cliff to give depth to the character and explain some of the motivations Cliff had (which, admittedly, were somewhat self serving). This comes from The Rocketeer: The Complete Deluxe Edition, which is unfortunately quite difficult to find now but has pages and pages of storyboards (like the one below) and notes from Dave Stevens on the characters and story he wanted to create.
There are now Thirteenth Hour toys! If you’d like to pick up one of these glow in the dark figures for yourself, feel free to email me or go to the Etsy store I set up (https://www.etsy.com/shop/ThirteenthHourStudio) and get them there.
If you haven’t checked out “Arcade Days,” the song and video Jeff Finley, Brent Simon, and I finished one year ago, click on the link below to do so!
You can find more pictures and preview clips of “Arcade Days” on IG as well as this podcast’s FB page.
Empty Hands, the synth EP soundtrack to the novella, Empty Hands, is now out for streaming on Bandcamp.
Stay tuned. Follow along on Spotify! There is also a growing extended Thirteenth Hour playlist on Spotify with a growing number of retro 80s songs.
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s Instagram pages: @the13thhr for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art and and @the13thhr.ost for more 80s music, movies, and songs from The Thirteenth Hour books and soundtrack.
Hope your new year is off to a good start. In this episode, I continue with the theme started last year about discussing new year’s goals. I’ve been working on a part of The Thirteenth Hour sequel draft where the main characters, Logan and Aurora, are making a life for themselves on a little seemingly secluded island, and towards the end of The Thirteenth Hour, they plan how they’re going to do that. It fits the general theme of making new year’s plans, so I’m reading a few excerpts from that part of the book today.
Again, best wishes in all your creative pursuits in 2020!
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There are now Thirteenth Hour toys! If you’d like to pick up one of these glow in the dark figures for yourself, feel free to email me or go to the Etsy store I set up (https://www.etsy.com/shop/ThirteenthHourStudio) and get them there.
If you haven’t checked out “Arcade Days,” the song and video Jeff Finley, Brent Simon, and I finished one year ago, click on the link below to do so!
You can find more pictures and preview clips of “Arcade Days” on IG as well as this podcast’s FB page.
Empty Hands, the synth EP soundtrack to the novella, Empty Hands, is now out for streaming on Bandcamp.
Stay tuned. Follow along on Spotify! There is also a growing extended Thirteenth Hour playlist on Spotify with a growing number of retro 80s songs.
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s Instagram pages: @the13thhr for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art and and @the13thhr.ost for more 80s music, movies, and songs from The Thirteenth Hour books and soundtrack.
This week, I take a trip back to 1989 in reading a Choose Your Own Adventure book – Master of Kung Fu by Richard Brightfield and illustrated by Frank Bolle. It’s a real blast from the blast – a true mish-mash of 80s Asian tropes, including most of the stuff that permeated martial arts films at the time. Some of it is truly, well, cringeworthy, like some of the 80s kung fu and ninja flicks back then … but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I thought these books were the bee’s knees in 1989 so I’m going to try to suspend, you know, reality (at least in an adult sense), and appreciate this with the mind of an elementary school age child (which makes it awesome again).
By the way, speaking of kung fu and ninjas, yes, they’re both in this book. Yes, I know it’s talking about China and kung fu and white lotus societies. There are still ninjas (suspend judgement, suspend judgement, suspend judgement, ok? Ninjutsu has some roots in Chinese martial arts, and it all goes back to India and Tibet, anyway, so … you know, just go with it).
Yup, straight out of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom – totally not joking … one of the more cringeworthy parts … product of the times.
Basically sums up the 80s ninja craze – stick ’em everything! Especially wearing the black PJs in broad daylight, since you know, that blends in so well. It all made more sense in 1989.
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There are now Thirteenth Hour toys! If you’d like to pick up one of these glow in the dark figures for yourself, feel free to email me or go to the Etsy store I set up (https://www.etsy.com/shop/ThirteenthHourStudio) and get them there.
If you haven’t checked out “Arcade Days,” the song and video Jeff Finley, Brent Simon, and I finished last winter, click on the link below to do so!
You can find more pictures and preview clips of “Arcade Days” on IG as well as this podcast’s FB page.
Empty Hands, the synth EP soundtrack to the novella, Empty Hands, is now out for streaming on Bandcamp.
Stay tuned. Follow along on Spotify! There is also a growing extended Thirteenth Hour playlist on Spotify with a growing number of retro 80s songs.
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s Instagram pages: @the13thhr for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art and and @the13thhr.ost for more 80s music, movies, and songs from The Thirteenth Hour books and soundtrack.
This week, we’re doing a reading of a short children’s book, “The Princess Knight” by fantasy author Cornelia Funke. It’s a modern fairy tale, and a good one for the little girls in your life (good for boys, too). Check out this page to take a look at some of the whimsical illustrations inspired by medieval tapestries and this link to find a copy of the book.
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If you haven’t checked out “Arcade Days,” the song and video Jeff Finley, Brent Simon, and I have been working on the past year, click on the link below to do so!
You can find more pictures and preview clips of “Arcade Days” on IG as well as this podcast’s FB page.
Between Two Worlds, the synth EP follow up to Long Ago Not So Far Away is now out for streaming on Bandcamp.
The bonus track, called “Flight of the Cloudrider” has a 80s movie mashup music video (see if you can identify all the movies!) which is available on youtube. This app was largely created with the iphone app Auxy.
Stay tuned. Follow along on Spotify! There is also a growing extended Thirteenth Hour playlist on Spotify with a growing number of retro 80s songs.
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s Instagram pages: @the13thhr for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art and and @the13thhr.ost for more 80s music, movies, and songs from The Thirteenth Hour books and soundtrack.
This week, I’m reading a short excerpt from the martial arts novella, Empty Hands, as a follow up to last week’s episode on the Dungeons and Dragons influences. This section touches on the five elements in nature (more back in episode 151) and how they fit the characters:
Jake and Aurora both fell into a character class Wally the wizard had called the “earth type.” As the guys had mentioned, we’d done a little presentation detailing our strengths and weaknesses early in our training (I had to do mine twice since I didn’t understand the assignment the first time and had instead talked about Aurora). Wally used that assignment to go into something he called “The Elemental School of Personality Assessment,” which he said was an important part of not only our magical studies but our training in general. There were five main personality types corresponding to the five divisions of elemental forces in nature – earth, water, wind, fire, and space, as well as an infinite combination of blends.
Pure earth types were grounded, practical people who, like strongly rooted trees, were good at weathering the vicissitudes of life but could be a bit stubborn at times. Dependable, practical, and steady types like Jake and Ben fell into that category. Pure water types were kind of the opposite – adaptable and fluid, like water conforming to whatever container it finds itself in, though they could be a bit all over the place. Phil, an easy-going sort who tended to go with the flow, fit this category. He was not, however, a fickle person, prompting Wally to categorize him as an earth-water blend.
“You mean like mud?” Phil had said when Wally passed him the sheet of paper containing his alignment and its characteristics.
We’d laughed, but then Wally shrugged. “Water is flexible, but it can be hard, if the force is right. Earth is not fluid but mixed with a little water, it moves easily from one place to the next until it dries. Too much, though, and it just becomes dirty water. Do you get my drift?”
“Um … no,” Phil had said after a long pause.
“You will. For now, it basically means you have the best of both worlds.” Then to all of us, he said, “Keep in mind these are just predictions. It’s up to you to figure out if they’re accurate and how to apply the knowledge to your training.”
Like Phil, Aron also ended up a blend – part water and part wind. Pure wind types, like Allan, were open-minded and peaceful. Like birds soaring above the clouds, the day-to-day troubles of the earth-bound held little meaning for them. They craved freedom, which fit Aron, but could be a bit impractical and out of touch with reality (definitely Aron and sometimes Allan, who preferred to think everything through prior to acting on anything). Pure fire types, like Lance and Blake, were no-nonsense folk who believed the best defense was a good offense. It was pretty clear that dynamic, straight-forward weapons like the bow and sword fit guys like that. The downside of fire, of course, was that not all problems could be solved in direct ways.
That left the last category, which Wally had initially called “empty space.” Aron had burst out laughing at this, muttering something about it being the one that fit me best, and the others had joined in. Wally silenced them, then paused and said that, actually, Aron might have been right for once. This caused me to redden in anger and disappointment as Aron went bug-eyed and laughed hard enough to fall out of his chair.
It wasn’t like I was especially taken with any of the previous categories, but as the youngest and physically smallest of the Rangers, it would have been nice to not be different at something – anything – for once. I didn’t really care about not being able to run, swim, climb, fight, navigate, or use magic as well as the others. Unlike some, I couldn’t imagine myself “a career man,” so excelling at soldiering skills (assuming I lived long enough), seemed a bit irrelevant for me and my life in the long run. Frankly, I couldn’t have cared less whether I fit earth, wind, water, fire, or some blend of the four – but “empty space?” Come on!
As if reading my thoughts, Wally frowned and said, “Empty space is perhaps not the right term. The magic books sometimes use the word void (which produced a burst of hoots from Aron), but that, too, has always seemed a poor choice. It’s …” he frowned, sighed, then continued. “At some point in the future, science will catch up to what we wizards have known for eons – that all matter is composed of tiny particles too small to see. They are the essence, the anima, that gives substance and life to all things in the natural world. And, as such, particles from the void can become any of the four. Add enough of them packed together, and they become earth. Space them out far enough, they become wind. Push them a bit closer together, they reform as water. Add a bolt of lightning or some other energy source, and they become fire.”
Allan nodded, saying, “Most interesting. So this is the essence we harness when we generate magic.”
“Exactly! You are pulling directly from the void,” Wally said.
There was silence for a time as we mulled this over. Finally, Jake turned around in his seat and looked at me with his steady, cool brown eyes. “I’m sorry we laughed, Logan. It was wrong of us.”
I reddened further and stared down at my notebook, doodling with my piece of charcoal. “It’s okay,” I finally said, still avoiding Jake’s eyes. When I look back on that experience, I wish I had met and held the man’s gaze to let him know I appreciated his apology. But … there are some things I suppose that only come with age.
After a moment, Aron asked quietly, “So … do you think there’s maybe a little void somewhere in me?”
Wally rolled his eyes and said “Aron, be grateful for what you have.” After the lesson finished, Wally handed me the piece of paper containing information on my alignment. On the side, he had written:
Read this over, and see if you think it fits. Find me if you have any questions.
~Wally
P.S. The woman you told us about from your town – the one you grew up with – sounds like more of an earth type, though at least from your description, she sounds like an earth – void blend. I can see why you would enjoy her company. Hope that gives you some more information about yourself that will be helpful in the coming months.
To be honest, it wasn’t then, but looking back years later, it sure has been.
Here’s a little character sketch I did about a year ago (a little different from their final iteration) when I was coming up with the ideas presented above:
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This page formerly had what I affectionately dubbed a “starving artist” section on little side hustles you could do (mostly on the internet, often with a phone) to make a few bucks here and there, often in gift cards. Well, now you can listen to this show (as well as other podcasts) and get paid to do so! Check out https://www.podcoin.com/ to listen to the show and start earning points that you can redeem for gift cards (Amazon, Target, Starbucks, etc) or donations to a number of charities. Use the code “Thirteen” when you sign up to get 300 extra points. The Thirteen Hour Podcast is now on BONUS this week, so you can earn more than normal (1.5x).
Empty Hands, the synth EP soundtrack to the novella, Empty Hands, is now out for streaming on Bandcamp.
Follow along on Spotify! There is also a growing extended Thirteenth Hour playlist on Spotify with a growing number of retro 80s songs.
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s Instagram pages: @the13thhr for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art and and @the13thhr.ost for more 80s music, movies, and songs from The Thirteenth Hour books and soundtrack.
We’re going to take a break from figure making this week to read a bit from The Thirteenth Hour to give a little background to the subject of the Dungeons and Dragons campaign my brother and I have been doing the last few weeks. The passage I read is from the very beginning of the book and describes a little about why he is as he is.
Here’s an excerpt from the setting to the Roll20 D and D game, The Case of the Almost Assassination, which is about how King Darian almost meets an untimely demise!
Three evenings before Immortality Day, there has been an attempt on King Darian IV’s life!
Can Lester LeFoe and Claudia Copperhoof, ace investigators of the LeFoe Detective Agency, find the would-be killers and root out the conspiracy?
The game is afoot!
THE SETTING
Tartec, capital of the Tartec Kingdom, is a crowded city of 150,000 nestled against the banks of the Blue River. It is the seat of power for the so-called “immortal” King Darian IV, who supposedly discovered the secret of eternal life – a mysterious potion known only as “coffee” – a few years ago. The city is one of harsh rules and regulations, with a visible distinction between the rich and poor. Tartec’s wealthy live in the splendid neighborhoods of High Town, located along the northern and western walls, while the regular and poor folk reside in the much dingier Low Town, which borders the southern and eastern docks. In the center of town is Lura’s Square, a marketplace, park and one of the few areas where different social classes freely mingle.
Thanks to strict laws instituted by King Darian, intimate contact between unmarried men and women in Tartec is frowned upon, and harsh punishments await any persons found bootlegging, gambling or engaged in otherwise “untrustworthy” activities. Despite this, it is widely known that secret dens of vice can be found in Low Town if you know where to look, and rumor has it the nobles of High Town have many shady secrets nestled within their giant manors.
In recent months, King Darian has sent his armies and Imperial Rangers out across the world to search for the secret of eternal youth, since immortality is not enough if you can’t be young to enjoy it. Perhaps inspired by rumors of a young man riding a “magical board” that have been floating around the capital for some time, he has created an army Science Division to study strange, unearthed relics from another time, or perhaps another continent. Finally, he has assimilated many nearby territories, leading to an influx of refugees in the capital city. The most notorious of these newly acquired lands is Neva, a territory bordering the Great Desert that was formerly ruled by the notorious Gostantin Crime Family.
At the time of our story, it is three days before Immortality Day, the annual holiday created by King Darian to celebrate his discovery of the mystical coffee brew. At the LeFoe Detective Agency, located along 1 Willow Ave in Low Town, a mysterious case awaits!
Listen or watch the replays of these episodes (each around 2 hrs) by clicking on the pictures below:
And if you enjoy the idea of being read to (even if you are an adult, when people seldom read to you an anymore), check out actor and former Reading Rainbow host Levar Burton’s podcast, where he reads short stories accompanied by music and sound effects.
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Between Two Worlds, the synth EP follow up to Long Ago Not So Far Awayis now out for streaming on Bandcamp.
The bonus track, called “Flight of the Cloudrider” has a 80s movie mashup music video (see if you can identify all the movies!) which is available on youtube. This app was largely created with the iphone app Auxy.
Stay tuned. Follow along on Spotify! There is also a growing extended Thirteenth Hour playlist on Spotify with a growing number of retro 80s songs.
Signup for the mailing list for a free special edition podcast, a demo copy of The Thirteenth Hour, and access to retro 80s soundtrack!
Have this podcast conveniently delivered to you each week on iTunes and Stitcher.
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s Instagram pages: @the13thhr for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art and and @the13thhr.ost for more 80s music, movies, and songs from The Thirteenth Hour books and soundtrack.
Today’s show is a reading from an illustrated children’s book version of the fairy tale, “Swan Lake,” accompanied by the music from the suite by Tchaikovsky. It comes from a book written by ballerina Margot Fonteyn and illustrated by Trina Schart Hyman, whose work has been featured many times here. Although maybe not a fairy tale with the same vintage as, say, the Grimm’s tales, at this point, I think the tale penned by Tchaikovsky for the ballet has all the elements of a traditional fairy tale, and at this point, is sufficiently old and famous enough to be timeless. This version has Hyman’s usual beautiful illustrations, some of which are below:
The reading is set to a truncated version of the Swan Lake Score (was looking for one that was about 30 minutes):
The bonus track, called “Flight of the Cloudrider” has a 80s movie mashup music video (see if you can identify all the movies!) which is available on youtube. This app was largely created with the iphone app Auxy.
Stay tuned. Follow along on Spotify! There is also a growing extended Thirteenth Hour playlist on Spotify with a growing number of retro 80s songs.
Signup for the mailing list for a free special edition podcast, a demo copy of The Thirteenth Hour, and access to the retro 80s soundtrack!
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s Instagram pages: @the13thhr for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art and and @the13thhr.ost for more 80s music, movies, and songs from The Thirteenth Hour books and soundtrack.
Today’s podcast is the double fairy tale reading of “The Twelve Dancing Princesses” and “The Six Swans” (a version of which was featured on episode 97) from The Candlewick Book of Fairy Tales by Sarah Hayes and illustrated by PJ Lynch (see the some of his wonderfully detailed illustrations below):
By the way, there’s a new section to the show: if you ever have a question or something you’d like to hear addressed, read, or discussed on the show, just comment in the show notes or email. Same goes for a guest you’d like to see on.
Speaking of which, in the next few week, we’ll be hearing from author and illustrator Chad Derdowski as well as musician and now drone pilot Brent Simon, who we first heard about in the interview with Jeff Finley! Stay tuned!
As always, thanks for listening!
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Signup for the mailing list for a free special edition podcast, a demo copy of The Thirteenth Hour, and access to retro 80s soundtrack!
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s instagram pages: @the13thhr and@the13thhr.ost for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art, 80s music, movies, and pictures or songs from The Thirteenth Hour books.
Today’s podcast is the reading of a fairy tale called “The Tinder Box” from The Fairy Tale Book by Marie Ponsot (translator) and Adrienne Segur (illustrator) from The Golden Book of Fairy Tales. You can read the tale in full (as written by Hans Christian Andersen) here. There is even a commentary with history and analysis here.
One of the illustrations from the tale:
By the way, there’s a new section to the show: if you ever have a question or something you’d like to hear addressed, read, or discussed on the show, just comment in the show notes or email. Same goes for a guest you’d like to see on.
Speaking of which, next week, we’ll be hearing from author and illustrator Missy Sheldrake, who came on the show about a year ago.
As always, thanks for listening!
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Signup for the mailing list for a free special edition podcast, a demo copy of The Thirteenth Hour, and access to retro 80s soundtrack!
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s instagram pages: @the13thhr and@the13thhr.ost for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art, 80s music, movies, and pictures or songs from The Thirteenth Hour books.
In today’s show, I’m talking about some previews coming from a draft I’m working on for the sequel(s) to The Thirteenth Hour, some of which takes place in a technologically advanced world with strange aspects of future life, like fanciful ways to get around.
A vapor rider is basically a magic powered boat with hydrofoils that allows it to skim across the surface of the water.
A cloud rider is magic powered flying wing to skim above the clouds.
You can see both vapor riders and cloud riders in the title graphic above.
Over the next few months, we’ll occasionally be reading from these old Zork stories, which essentially function as Choose Your Own Adventure style game books. Just like that series, there are decision points requiring you to go to different points in the book and black and white inked illustrations for many of the pages. I think these books are long out of print, but click on the image of the book below to see if you can find a used copy of your own.
The synthesizer music in between the sequel updates and the Zork reading is courtesy of Brent Simon, an internet sensation from the mid 2000s (yes, his music clips from his old MySpace age still miraculously work). You’ll hear more about him in a few weeks. Jeff Finley, who made a documentary about his friend that made it big a number of years ago, will be coming on the show in a few weeks!
Speaking of music, episode 100 will have more details about an upcoming EP, the sequel to Long Ago Not So Far Away. Podcast listeners get first dibs! Stay tuned. Follow along on Spotify! There is also a growing extended Thirteenth Hour playlist on Spotify with a growing number of retro 80s songs. Check it out!
As always, thanks for listening!
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Signup for the mailing list for a free special edition podcast, a demo copy of The Thirteenth Hour, and access to retro 80s soundtrack!
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s instagram pages: @the13thhr and @the13thhr.ost for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art, 80s music, movies, and pictures or songs from The Thirteenth Hour books.
Today’s podcast is the reading of a fairy tale “The Wild Swans” from The Fairy Tale Book by Marie Ponsot (translator) and Adrienne Segur (illustrator). There’s an updated version called The Golden Book of Fairy Tales.
We’ll read from it a few times in the future. It was one I recalled from childhood and has some wonderfully detailed illustrations with a number of traditional fairy tales, meaning that they aren’t the sanitized Disney versions. In fact, the worlds the characters inhabit are often cruel, and although they often do have happy endings, the characters really do go through a lot of pain and suffering to get there. Case in point:
As always, thanks for listening!
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Signup for the mailing list for a free special edition podcast, a demo copy of The Thirteenth Hour, and access to retro 80s soundtrack!
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s instagram pages: @the13thhr and@the13thhr.ost for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art, 80s music, movies, and pictures or songs from The Thirteenth Hour books.
Today’s episode is #3 in a three part telling of a fantasy short story by Ed Greenwood about Elminster the mage from the TSR Forgotten Realms anthology Realms of Valor. In this episode, Elminster meets his match and is helped by a friend. There’s also an afterword that talks about how Ed Greenwood and many others created the Forgotten Realms universe – essentially an open source multisite project spanning decades.
Found this funny picture with a quote from our man of the hour. I guess when you have lived 5 centuries, it’s easy to be zen about such things.
As always, thanks for listening!
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Signup for the mailing list for a free special edition podcast, a demo copy of The Thirteenth Hour, and access to retro 80s soundtrack!
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Today’s episode is #2 in a three part telling of a fantasy short story by Ed Greenwood about Elminster the mage from the TSR Forgotten Realms anthology Realms of Valor. In this episode, we find out why his going to the mage Con creates such havoc. My daughter refers to him as a “trouble maker.” But he’s sufficiently well known, trouble maker or not, to have his own wikipedia entry, where you can learn about him and his creator, Ed Grrenwood:
This illustration is from the cover of a companion to Realms of Valor, called Realms of Magic.
As always, thanks for listening!
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Signup for the mailing list for a free special edition podcast, a demo copy of The Thirteenth Hour, and access to retro 80s soundtrack!
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Today’s episode is a three part telling of a fantasy short story by Ed Greenwood about Elminster the mage from the TSR Forgotten Realms anthology Realms of Valor. He’s apparently a kind of Gandalf -like figure in the Forgotten Realms D and D world. In this episode, he goes to a wizards’ convention, and trouble finds him.
This picture by Ned Dameron shows Elminster and his travelling companion and bodyguard, Storm Silverhand.
As always, thanks for listening!
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Signup for the mailing list for a free special edition podcast, a demo copy of The Thirteenth Hour, and access to retro 80s soundtrack!
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Today’s episode is part 2 of the fantasy short story from the TSR Forgotten Realms anthology Realms of Valor, “The Bargain” by Elaine Cunningham. It centers around a half elf character called Arilyn Moonblade and her companion, Danilo Thann, and in the episode, we learn why the story is called as it is. If you missed the previous episode, here it is.
As always, thanks for listening!
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Today’s episode continues the theme of the last two weeks – reading aloud a fantasy short story from the TSR Forgotten Realms anthology Realms of Valor. This one is called “The Bargain” by Elaine Cunningham and centers around a half elf character called Arilyn Moonblade and her companion, Danilo Thann. Here a pic of the two striking heroic poses, painting by Fred Fields:
So, like the last two weeks, listen along as I continue to butcher the names left and right and try to avoid putting in running commentary when I don’t understand something. I’m getting a bit better. I think if I had started with stories like these when I was a kid instead of books that just had cool covers, I might have made out better with fantasy in general.
To be continued next week!
The first page of the story had this title illustration by Ned Dameron. He did a number of illustrations for the Dark Tower books if that name rings a bell.
As always, thanks for listening!
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Signup for the mailing list for a free special edition podcast, a demo copy of The Thirteenth Hour, and access to retro 80s soundtrack!
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Today’s episode continues where we left off last week (in the reading of “Dark Mirror” by R.A Salvatore from the anthology Realms of Valor) as Drizzt, the dark elf, and his magic panther with the unpronounceable name continue their travails to free a band of prisoners from some bad, bad creatures.
So, like last week, listen along as I continue to butcher the names left and right and try to avoid putting in running commentary when I don’t understand something. But, the great thing about this story is that although it starts off simple enough, like a traditional fantasy story with the bad guys (orcs) and the good guys (human farmers), it becomes less and less clear as the tale progress who the good and bad creatures actually are. I feel like if I had read more of this breed of fantasy story when I was a kid, I might have had a better time with the genre in general. Oh well.
Apologies for the audio quality on this episode. I had a lot of trouble recording for some reason. The only way to get rid of the weird buzzing in the background was to try to clean up the audio enough it softens parts a bit too much.
I finally found the artist, Todd Lockwood, who did the great picture, entitled “Orc King,” from last week’s show notes. Click on the full picture below to go to his website:
The first page of the story had this title illustration by Ned Dameron, which makes a little more sense this week than it did last week. He did a number of illustrations for the Dark Tower books if that name rings a bell.
As always, thanks for listening!
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Signup for the mailing list for a free special edition podcast, a demo copy of The Thirteenth Hour, and access to retro 80s soundtrack!
Follow The Thirteenth Hour’s instagram pages: @the13thhr and@the13thhr.ost for your random postings on ninjas, martial arts, archery, flips, breakdancing, fantasy art, 80s music, movies, and pictures or songs from The Thirteenth Hour books.
Today’s episode starts a two part reading of a short story called “Dark Mirror” by fantasy author R.A. Salvatore from the D and D Forgotten Realms world. It comes from a compilation of short stories in the book Realms of Valor. Listen along as I butcher the names left and right and try to avoid putting in running commentary (everything probably would make more sense if I were more familiar with the world or Dungeons and Dragons). I enjoyed it, though – I feel that since I write in this genre, I should at least try to educate myself a little … This story, which we’ll finish next week, has the popular dark elf character, Drizzt. (I mangle his name, too, and holy smokes, forget about his cat’s name. I tried.)
The first page had this title illustration by Ned Dameron.
To be continued next week!
As always, thanks for listening!
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In honor of International Women’s Day (3/8/17), a few weeks ago, we read some stories about heroines from a book called The Serpent Slayer And Other Stories of Strong Women by Katrin Tchana and illustrated by Trina Schart Hyman. (See Episodes 84 and 85). Today’s tale from the same volume has more of a humorous spin about two teenagers who fall in love at first sight and rely on the wee folk to make things right. It reminds me of something Disney would have put out in the mid 90s (for better or worse). As usual, the illustrations are wonderful:
As always, thanks for listening!
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In honor of International Women’s Day (3/8/17), this is our second fairy tale reading from the book, The Serpent Slayer And Other Stories of Strong Women by Katrin Tchana and illustrated by Trina Schart Hyman. This week, we’re reading an Chinese tale about a teenage girl named Li Chi who slays a serpent that has been terrorizing a small community for years. It’s a very traditional story in structure, getting at themes of greed, ignorance, blind obedience in the face of power and corruption, and the boldness (sometimes foolhardiness) of adolescence that has driven the beating heart of many a rebel, despite being outweighed and under-armed. The main difference, however, is the protagonist is female – although the story is a human one, not just applicable to one gender.
As patriarchal a society as China was, ancient Chinese mythology does have its share of heroines, and this is a representative tale. You can find it told and depicted elsewhere on the web, even on youtube in this video game (just the first few minutes of the video is the story).
In other news, next week, we’re going to have an audio transcript of a talk a number of other authors and I did on:
“World Building in Science Fiction and Fantasy: The Essentials
With the Association of Rhode Island Authors
The Science Fiction/Fantasy genre transports readers to new worlds, from the wondrous to the weird. Fans of the genre know that solid world building is essential to the story. When it’s done well, we become immersed in the tale. When it’s done poorly, we notice. Join us for a discussion with local speculative fiction writer’s to learn their secrets. How do they construct believable worlds in unbelievable settings? What are some of the problems and pitfalls they’ve encountered? Where do they find inspiration? When imagination and writing craft successfully intersect, the results can be out of this world! If you are an aspiring speculative fiction writer or fan, this presentation is for you.” (from the Big Apple Con website)
As always, thanks for listening!
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This week, we’re reading an Armenian tale called Sun Girl and Dragon Prince. It has many of the traditional fairy tale archetypes you see again and again in Grimm-styles tales. I found the end kind of odd, but maybe because it didn’t wrap up as neatly as some fairy tales do. It also has that classic, but sometimes annoying theme of downtrodden-yet-beautiful-girl-with-a-heart-of-gold who tames wild beasts into civilized men. There’s a reason that story is classic … but it’s probably inspired plenty of young maidens to go kissing more than their share of frogs, hoping they’d turn into princes of their own.
There are parallels to those themes in The Thirteenth Hour prequel, A Shadow in the Moonlight, so what can I say? Fairy tale characters don’t always make great role models for real life 🙂 Interestingly enough, although I’d never read this tale before, there’s a hunter in it who has a lot of parallels to the cursed hunter in A Shadow in the Moonlight as well. (You can read that tale free and find out for yourself.)
As always, thanks for listening!
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Since this week’s episode takes place in Russia, where snow is not uncommon, part of it was recorded outside, where there was a lot of snow. Since I had my daughter strapped to my back, I could adopt my usual hamfisted approach to shoveling snow (which, to be fair, is a whole body workout). So instead, I decided to try of a variant of the ninja sweeping method I talked about a few weeks ago. I’m calling it ninja snow shoveling:
You basically just shift your hips forward and back to load up some snow (steps 2 and 3). To dump it (step 4), you lean forward, quickly shoot out the shovel like a pool cue while giving it a simultaneous turn so the snow flops over onto the ground (or wherever you want to put it). There’s some arm action, but not much, and your back and shoulders stay pretty much neutral. Result? A ton easier!
Anyway, that doesn’t much to do with today’s episodes, which is a version of the folktale, The Firebird. However, back in episode 61, I talked about the video game The Last Express, which has the tale of The Firebird woven into its plot.
This is a children’s book version of the ballet version.
As always, thanks for listening!
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Today, my daughter and I are reading a beautifully illustrated fairy tale written and illustrated by Ruth Sanderson. This tale, which being quite similar to the Grimm brother’s tale The Water of Life, which we read earlier this year, takes a number of fairy tale archetypes and shakes them up into a new variant. Even though it’s intended for younger audiences, I remember really liking this picture book when I was a teenager, when I first encountered it. Check out some of the highly detailed, almost photorealistic painting that adorn the book:
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This week, we are reading an old Arthurian legend, retold by Margaret Hodges and illustrated by Trina Schart Hyman:
I think the actual tale is a bit more complex and convoluted than this version, but this one distills it down nicely to the important bits. And even if real life is more complex, it is good to remind oneself that sometimes good things do actually happen to good people, that appearances can be deceiving, and a bit of kitchen work, as menial as it might seem, never hurt anyone.
Thanks for listening!
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In this week’s episode, we start off the new year by reading a fairy tale that I loved as a child. In many ways, I think the underlying theme of looking for a potion that grants the drinker life and health probably influenced my decision to include a similar plot device in The Thirteenth Hour. This book is written by Barbara Rogasky and features the illustrations of Trina Schart Hyman, who had been featured many times here.
Happy New Year, and thanks for listening!
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On today’s episode, we read Chapter 2 of one of my favorite books of all time, Lost in Place, which is a memoir written by Mark Salzman about his childhood and adolescence in suburban Connecticut during the 1970s. We read chapter 1 back in episode #57. Here’s a quick recap from the film Protagonist, where the author brings us up to speed:
Here he talk about his kung fu instructor, introduced in this chapter:
Thanks for listening!
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That first day began a month of basic training that all recruits were required to go through. Nobody told us why the King had sent for us, and when we asked, we were told to just shut up and stop trying to think. I had some trouble with the training in the beginning, but after that, I surprised myself by being able to keep up just fine. I was used to physical labor, and this wasn’t much different. A few of the older men, though, unused to climbing, running, and crawling on the ground, collapsed after the first week and had to be carried off the field on stretchers. This happened to one of the Aquarians a few days into our training. He happened to be not far from me, and when I saw him collapse on the field, I went over to see if he were okay. But he pushed me away and, spitting out some mud, said something that sounded like “piss off.” I think he also spat out something about going back to the orphanage, but I couldn’t make it out. Whatever it was, it wasn’t friendly, and I left him to the medics. Every morning at six sharp, we had to line up for morning exercises. Then came the obstacle course, which was pretty hard at first because the old soldier babysitting us – fat, half–blind, and unable to do half of the things he made us do – didn’t feel like showing us how to do it. He was also frequently hung–over, which didn’t help.
His first lesson, dare I even call it that, was on marching. I was a miserable failure at marching, and, to be honest, never did learn to do it right. Our marching exercises consisted of an endless and, in my opinion, rather pointless array of drills. March left. Now right. Spin left. Then right. Whatever! I always ended up in the first row since I was the shortest, and although I could manage forward and backward, every time we had to turn left or right I got all mixed up. My right or the instructor’s right? If I had eyes in the back of my head, I could have cheated by seeing which way the other recruits turned, but inevitably, I screwed it up and got glares and whispered threats from the proud Aquarian men.
So you might be wondering, what about the good stuff? Well, the drill instructor was technically responsible for teaching us how to use weapons – things like swords, spears, and bows. The problem was that there were never enough to go around, since the “real Army” got preference over us recruits. So we often spent most of this time sitting around waiting until someone else was done with the rusty sword or whatever we were supposed to be using that day. Not that it really mattered in the end; after one of the men accidentally shot himself in the foot with an arrow, the old soldier in charge of training us didn’t trust us with live weapons. He was afraid he might accidentally–on purpose be in the way the next time. Can’t say I blamed him; morale was pretty low, even in the “real Army,” and no one felt like extending himself any more than he had to, especially if there was danger involved. After the arrow incident, all we got were branches chopped off a tree.
“Here, pretend this one’s a spear,” the drill instructor would say, handing out the wobbly saplings. “But that’s no damned excuse for not put the ol’ killer instinct to work!” he would yell. “Stop thinking these are sticks. Like I told you yesterday, they’re spears, damn it! Spears! So when you thrust, yell! When you charge, yell! I want some spirit! All together, now, lemme hear it! Kill! Kill! Kill! Hey, why am I the only one shouting?”
Really, I’m not kidding. The old man was nothing if not cracked. And, true to form, every day, he had us line up at the western corner of the training field, where there was a thin row of midget–sized trees.
“Come on, ladies, one tree to a man, just like yesterday. Now watch the master.”
He delighted in this demonstration. He’d take a stance about ten feet from some poor shrub and begin to twirl his stick around. Then he’d stop, look menacingly at the pint–sized tree, and, with a blood curdling whoop, charge forward and begin smacking the trunk, each time, shouting his “Kill! Kill! Kill!” routine punctuated with an occasional, “How do you like that, huh?” One time I swear he even said, “Not so tough, now, are ya … tree!”
After a bit, he’d get tired and, turning to us while leaning on his stick and sucking in more wind than a geriatric racehorse, he’d explain that was the kind of energy you needed to attack with.
“Now you!” he would bark, and a recruit had to repeat what had just been demonstrated.
The instructor had been satisfied only once, when an unlucky recruit had hit a patch of mud on his charge, and instead of hitting the tree with his stick, hit it full force with his sliding body instead. The young, slender tree simply recoiled from the blow, sending the recruit flying back into the mud. Tree: 1, human: 0.
“Yeah!!! That boy has the kinda attitude I want!” He even went over to help the dazed boy to his feet. “That’s what I’m talkin’ ’bout, boy. Next time you just make sure to show that tree who’s the damn boss. Watch and learn from the master.”
Then he took a swipe at the errant shrub himself but missed and, cursing and spitting, fell flat on his ass. That was the end of the lesson for the day. Tree: 2, human: 0.
Logan and Aurora look up at the night sky near the trees referenced in this passage near the end of the book.
Thanks for listening, and happy holidays!
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Back in the 70s and 80s, there were a ton of these little softcover books published by author and artist team Stephen Cosgrove and Robin James. They were short illustrated books intended to be read to children featuring animals in a fantasy setting and a little moral at the end. They were, in a sense, short fairy tales.
One of the nice things, I always thought, were the beautiful illustrations accompanying each page done by Robin James. I’m sure they provided inspiration to many a young artist.
Interestingly enough, these books were an early successful foray in self publishing. Apparently, the author, Stephen Cosgrave, initially couldn’t get anyone to publish his books so he decided to take the process on himself. I can imagine that must have quite an undertaking at the time, since even today, it is expensive to get books printed in color while keeping the price point at something reasonable a parent will be willing to spend. Good for him for sticking with it long enough for it to take off.
In any event, this is a particularly cute one I read with my daughter about the unlikely friendship between a unicorn and a sheep.
Here are some pictures from the book:
As always, thanks for listening!
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This week, my daughter and I are reading The Sleeping Beauty, written/retold and beautifully illustrated by Trina Schart Hyman, who also illustrated St. George and the Dragon, which we read on episode #52. Below are some pictures:
As an aside, my brother recently told me that Stan Bush, the man behind “The Touch”created a new 80s-style anthem for the game Shadow Warrior 2 – something that is incredibly awesome on so many levels I don’t know where to start. You can listen to the EP on Souncloud! (click on the link above to listen).
Speaking of which, the soundtrack to The Thirteenth Hour, Long Ago Not So Far Away is done and will be coming out on 11/13/16. It will be available digitally and on CD. If I can find a few cassette tapes, I may even try to make a few cassettes that will be available on the eBay store for the truly old school. (Remember making mix tapes? This assumes I actually remember how to do that 🙂 If you want an advance preview in the next few weeks, sign up for the mailing list for a free advance digital copy!
As always, thanks for listening!
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Free online streaming of the growing Thirteenth Hour soundtrack: https://joshuablum.bandcamp.com/ Stay tuned to a full 45+ min album coming in the next few weeks!
This week, I’m reading the first chapter of perhaps my favorite book of all time, Lost in Place, by Mark Salzman. I first read the book as a teenager and still find it hugely entertaining two decades later. It’s probably not surprising that aspects of Mark’s writing style have influenced how I portray characters in books like The Thirteenth Hour.
He writes about his coming of age with an honest, Wonder Years-style of sardonic narration infused with just enough boyish innocence to capture both the magic and despair of adolescence and young adulthood. That’s not everyone’s up of tea, of course, but when I first opened up the book, I immediately felt at home. I imagine if John Huges (screenwriter and director of 80s teen movies like Sixteen Candles and The Breakfast Club), had written a memoir, it would probably be something like this book.
On a personal level, I suppose it’s extra special since he writes about his experiences in the martial arts and early desires to be an astronaut (a lifelong hobby and short-lived career aspiration that my mother and father, like Mark’s decidedly earthbound parents, humored for years, for which I’ve always been grateful).
As an aside, you can watch a movie Mark wrote and starred in based on his first book teaching English in China while training in Chinese wushu. Watch Iron and Silk here.
And, if in the unlikely event that this page makes its way across your computer screen, Mark, PLEASE COME ON THE SHOW!
Ok.
I’ve gotten control of myself and will tone down the rampant fanboyism. Can’t help it. =)
As a side note, if you hear a sound in the background that sounds like Darth Vader, it’s because I was reading this episode while holding my daughter, who was sleeping. Just so you know.
On that note, as always, thanks for listening!
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This week, in honor of Labor Day in the USA, I’m reading a few excerpts from The Thirteenth Hour that go out to all those unsung folks doing jobs that keep our world running smoothly, often behind the scenes. For example, Aurora here is a dishwasher, and how often do they get their due?
That evening, I met Aurora in town at the pub for a meal before our work shifts started. She received a discount on food there and could bring a guest for free, so it worked out better than the soldiers’ dining hall in the castle, which offered no discounts, absolutely no guests, and was awful to boot. When we sat down at a booth, I discovered the book in my back pocket.
“Whatcha got there?” She looked the little book over. “Oh, knitting. Interesting. Do you know, I learned how once, at the orphanage, but I never really got the hang of it. Hmm, let’s see if I remember any of this stuff,” she said as she flipped through the manual…
…“Nope, don’t remember a thing about knitting, unfortunately,” said Aurora, knocking me out of my reverie.
Just then, a waitress with a sour expression on her face brought over two bowls of stew, two glasses of water, and a hunk of bread. Aurora invited her to sit down with us while we ate, and the woman’s annoyed expression brightened for a moment as she welcomed the opportunity to avoid work for a few more minutes. She poured herself a pint of ale from the tap behind her and collapsed heavily onto the booth next to Aurora. Aurora introduced me to the waitress, who said, “Oh, so you’re Logan. Aurora mentioned someone like you.” Her eyes came to rest on the book on knitting.
“You were reading this?”
Aurora smiled and nodded.
“What the hell for? You work for a living now, why do you want to go back to this garbage? They got stores for this, you know.” I noticed that the waitress had repositioned herself towards Aurora in the manner that women did when they wanted to create a third wheel. “Oh … well, sure. I just thought it was, well, interesting.”
“Ha! That’s gotta be the overstatement of the year. More like the most uninteresting thing ever. What the hell’s it good for?”
“Well … you’ll always be able to make clothes if you can knit,” I reasoned.
As the waitress shifted back to look at me, her eyes narrowed to slits. They said, “I didn’t ask you.” But her mouth said, “You know, I once had a husband who said that to me, and look where it got him. Humph.” She gave Aurora a stern, teacherly kind of look as she got up to go. “Get rid of this guy now,” it seemed to say.
Aurora looked embarrassed but shrugged it off. “Sorry, she’s like that to everyone at first.”
Just then, a door at the back of the room swung open and a deep voice yelled, “Aurora, where the hell are you? We’re opening in five minutes! Look at all these dishes! There’s no end to these …” the yelling trailed away as the door swung shut.
“Uggh, I guess I gotta go, Logan. Sorry,” she tossed her hands up a little as she stood and dropped her napkin on the table.
“Ah, it’s alright, Aurora. Tomorrow, at the gym, then?”
“Sure, I …”
“Aurora, did you hear me, dammit! Get your ass in here!” yelled the voice from the back again.
Aurora rolled her eyes and sighed. “Yeah, I’ll be there in a minute!” she yelled over her back. I helped her gather the dirty dishes.
“Thanks, I got it.”
“Now, dammit! Do I have to come out there?”
“Jeeze, go on before that guy busts a vein or something,” I said. She kissed me quickly then ran through the swinging back door. In her hurry, she forgot one of the bowls, which I scooped up and placed on a tray of other dirty dishes. The waitress that had sat with us happened to look over and gave me a dirty look as I walked out.
“No tip again,” she muttered. “Bastard.”
I heard her but did not understand. Since I had never been able to afford restaurants before, I was still pretty new to eating in one; perhaps there was some unspoken custom I was not aware of, probably involving money or work – the things adults typically complained of – and my general ignorance about both was probably what had incurred the waitress’ wrath to begin with.
You can hear more excerpts on the show. Enjoy your day of rest, and know that if you have one of those essential buy thankless jobs, whether it pays or not – stay-at-home parents, take note – there people out there who are grateful. =)
As always, thanks for listening!
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This week, we’re reading an illustrated adaptation of the first part of Edmund Spenser’s Faerie Queen – the tale of St. George and the Dragon. The one we’re reading from was illustrated by Trina Schart Hyman (check out a tribute and bio on this blog) and penned by Margaret Hodges. You can find a copy online at retailers like Amazon or you local library. There are a few pictures and excerpts includes below. I’d recommend any of the books written and illustrated by this duo if you enjoy fairy tales and/or fantasy art.
The tale is an abridged version for children of the original, which was a lengthy poem. You can find a summary of the original Faerie Queen tale and a commentary here. It’s more adult oriented than this version and has more overt allegorical/religious/moral overtones as opposed to this one, which reads more like a traditional fairy tale and mirrors the end of the original poem, a summary of which you can find here.
Personally, I have always wondered why everyone had it in for the dragon, who also fought a good fight, and I kind of felt bad for him. Here he was minding his own business and … well, I guess that kind of flips the story on its head, doesn’t it. Maybe someone one day can rewrite the tale from the dragon’s point of view.
But that’s neither here nor there. Anyhow, I posted a few pictures from the book on Instagram before from the book, which you can find here:
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